My Baby Won’t Go To Sleep Or Stay Asleep

The books are rubbish. Don’t buy them. They tell you conflicting information about how to get babies to sleep but they just don’t work!

At 20 months, Chloe should be able to self settle now. Some nights she does and falls asleep with no bother. I swear she is luring us into a false sense of achievement, like we’ve finally achieved great parent status, then the next night passes and BAM! – she just won’t settle down!!

She is shattered. I know she’s shattered. I lay down next to her cot, rubbing her leg through the bar hoping that the rhythm will send her off to sleep. But no. She just sits there, silently. Rubbing her eyes every now and then and her eyes dropping and opening again.

The pins and needles in my hand get worse as her head gently falls forward and her eyes close. I stop breathing as I realise that she’s nodded off. However, she’s still sitting up and as her head rolls she wakes again, which means I have to sit, with my whole arm now full of pins and needles.

I know I could leave her and let her cry it out but I hate the idea of it. We’ve tried it before, loads of times. Don’t get me wrong, we did it on D when she was 8 months old and it worked. A few nights were rough to start but she settled after the third night and then “slept like a baby” and still does.

Chloe fast asleepSo I lay here in the dark bedroom on the floor. My whole right side has no feeling as I watch my youngest daughter act with the same amount of stubbornness as her mother. I realise that although I knew this was what my night would entail, like every night, I still didn’t plan ahead and put a blanket or a pillow down to keep me a little bit comfy.

But Chloe just won’t do crying it out. She cries for ever. I don’t mind a baby crying and think it’s good for them for parents not to run back straight away, but she really just doesn’t stop crying! She does quieten for a few seconds then realises why she was crying and goes at it again.

The worst thing is that even when she does nod off, in the laying down position, I know I can’t leave. That just doesn’t work. She hears me. The slightest movement and she is back up again, begging to be picked up and cuddled.

I’m all out of ideas and the mother in law is also out of ideas so I definitely know that we’ve tried everything.

I don’t expect you to know how to get C to sleep, and to stay asleep past 4 am. I don’t want you tell me your blissful stories of your baby who goes to sleep at 7 pm for a solid 12 hours and has started to learn the ABCs already!

I just want you to know that my baby doesn’t sleep, that the other two did and that all babies are different. Some are just a little more testing than others but are all loved in exactly the same way.

Ricky Willis is the Founder and Editor of the Skint Dad blog. As well as an avid money saver, writer and blogger, Ricky also enjoys dabbling with the technical side of blogging and will soon be launching a WordPress tips blog,

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  • Jack

    My son was a sleeping nightmare too. I’d like to say it got better. It didn’t, not until the last few months at the age of 4.5. That is why he so frequently ended up in bed with us. No answers here, just…i feel ur pain and good luck.

  • Skint Dad

    Its funny because C isn’t consistent with it. Sometimes she sleeps all, other times she wakes every hour. We have taken her into our bed on occasions but she sees this as playtime!

    I know its just a phase and it will get better. I just hope the bags under my eyes will eventually fade away once it does. 😉

  • katie

    ahh i really feel for you that must be tough. Funnily i wrote a post on babies sleep a little while ago don’t worry it’s tongue in cheek!!

    My oldest was a great sleeper and my youngest not so great – nothing i did it’s just them!

    I hope the magic switch flicks on in her soon :)

  • Skint Dad

    Thanks, it is tough although I do take comfort in the thought that I’m not the only one suffering with a wide awake baby!

  • jo

    a close friend of mine had similar problems i really do feel for you as i was so lucky with mine your little one looks like she may be a little too old for this now but i have to say i highly reccomend the poco baby hammock for babies sleeping problems or not they really are amazing to get babies in a sleep routine. Have you seen anyone for sleep training my freind did and they can really help. good luck.

  • Ricky Willis

    Thanks for the tip. It’s so frustrating when you try loads of different things but none of them work!